It’s Time The Most Diverse Group In History Became One
As an independent voice in LGBT politics, I have the luxury and the responsibility to support those ideas that bring us closer to our goals. I received an email yesterday from Tacoma Washington resident and Board Chair of Tacoma Rainbow Center, Willie Painter. In it, he addresses an issue I have struggled with over the past few months: our diversity, which is our greatest strength, is under-utilized, untapped, and, as a result, is becoming our Achilles heel. Our diversity has led us to our recent wins in Vermont, Maine, even Iowa, but is also inhibiting our ability to address challenges with one clear voice in the battlegrounds of New Hampshire, New York, and especially California. In fact, California has become the “Groundhog Day” in our fight for equality: we continue to loose there, over and over, and we will continue to do so until we figure out how to move our message forward.
It’s no secret we lost California because we didn’t talk to the right people, use the right words, or use our greatest strength: our selves. That’s changing, and, while the travesty that is Proposition 8 has won and won again, we are moving towards the right message. But our adversaries are waging an all-out war, using the most heinous of all weapons: lies told about children, using children. It’s time we call NOM and others on this ugly tactic.
We have simple truths: we are the faceless, nameless, average, ordinary citizens who live simple lives, unknown to most, and we are the superstars of stage and screen, science, and services. Many of us want families, and children, and many of us do not. There is a strong meme wafting about the Internet right now, bemoaning the gentrification and assimilation of our outliers, our most colorful and unique members. But the more we wage these battles within our group, the more we risk taking our eye off the ball. Already, this week, we let the media control the conversation: instead of focusing our energies on next week’s fight in New Hampshire, or the three weeks left in our New York battle, or the work left to do on the Hate Crimes Bill, we let our anger over a lost Proposition 8 move our efforts. Now, we risk two losses: the one we have already lost over and over in California, and, in my opinion, the more important battle in New Hampshire. Why more important? Because our battle in New Hampshire was won, by the people already there. They won the war the right way: by being themselves, convincing their friends and neighbors without outside armies. And, since 2003, the majority of New Hampshire voters support gay marriage. For us to loose a tangible result of the battle in which we have already won hearts and minds is inexcusable.
All this brings me back to where I started. I received an email yesterday from Willie Painter, a man I have never met, never spoken with, and until yesterday had never even heard of. We have exchanged a few emails now. And now, I will share with you his message. And following it, the thoughts of two of our better-known LGBT orgainzations: Freedom To Marry, and The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force.
Dear LGBTQ organization leaders:
In the past 24 hours, I have been solicited for donations by Human Rights Campaign, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, my state’s local Equal Rights Washington, and a handful of others! All these aforementioned organizations have communicated their opinions regarding the California Supreme Court’s decision in response to Prop. 8. All these aforementioned organizations have made a plea for funds to enable them to advocate on behalf of LGBTQ people in the fight for marriage equality. However, in all of these communications, there has been no indication that these wonderful, like-minded organizations (and presumably many other federal and state LGBTQ organizations with a mission that seeks equality under the law for LGBTQ citizens) are collaborating and using donations in a collective, leveraging way to most effectively fight for equality on behalf of all those of us who desire and seek to get married and have marriage rights legally recognized in every state, throughout the United States.
We are strongest when we collaborate, when like-minded organizations are completely transparent with one another and their respective stakeholders, and when donors know that their donations are maximized by the leveraged use of their precious funds. I believe that we will soon see a day when LGBTQ people have the same legal rights as their heterosexual counterparts in every state. That day will come much sooner when all LGBTQ organizations commit and actively work together in ways that leverage the collective power of their respective supporters/volunteers/donors. So, that is a challenge I offer to all those in leadership positions of our LGBTQ organizations throughout the United States. And I, hopefully just like all the other hundreds of thousands of US citizens just like me, want our day, the day of true and actual equality, to come sooner rather than later. And I am confident that the hundred of thousands of US citizens just like me will become more actively involved than ever when LGBTQ organizations throughout the United States unite on this common front that will define this remarkable period in our humanity.
I ask you leaders to strongly consider holding a summit to tie the bond that your respective organizations share–equality. Please seek to find a way to most effectively and collaboratively advocate on behalf of us LGBTQ people in the United States who, perhaps more than ever before, need your leadership during this pivotal time of our shared future, soon to be our shared history. Let’s together make the transition from future to history one that we can all be proud of.
Sincerely,
Willie Painter
I reached out to a few friends in the LGBTQ arena. I’m grateful to them for their responses:
“While we know all of our partners in the movement for the freedom to marry work hard to collaborate, it’s also true that there should be more. With the progress recently achieved in the number of states joining Massachusetts and Connecticut in embracing marriage and the increasing efforts being made by our opponents to slow that progress through fear and innuendo, now is clearly the time for us all to work together as closely and forcefully as possible. We need to win more states and build the climate for change nationally, and that will only happen if we all individually talk about why marriage matters with our friends and family, neighbors and colleagues while helping to support a co-ordinated, collaborative movement of partner organizations, both gay and non-gay, in the struggle to end discrimination in marriage. “ — Evan Wolfson, Freedom To Marry
“We agree that a collaborating movement is a stronger movement! The National Gay and Lesbian Task Force has worked with numerous LGBT and non-LGBT organizations over the last 36 years. While each LGBT organization makes a unique contribution to our movement, we are proud of our extensive history of collaborative initiatives. For example, we:
work in partnership with SAGE (the premier LGBT organization working on aging issues) to address LGBT aging concerns and we receive collaborative funding for this work;
work in ongoing coalition with many national LGBT advocacy organizations in lobbying for pro-LGBT legislation and administration policy changes;
have hosted for over a decade the National Policy Roundtable (over 35 national LGBT organizations coordinating policy work and sharing strategies) and the National Religious Leadership Roundtable (a convening of over 65 faith leaders working to counter religious-based bigotry and promote understanding of and respect for LGBT people);
worked side by side with state, local and national organizations to win marriage equality in Massachusetts and Maine, and work with states across the country on nondiscrimination measures and marriage equality. And we have worked in partnership with organizations in California for over five years on marriage equality.
Our National Conference on LGBT Equality: Creating Change has been called the “Town Square of the Movement,” where our colleagues come together to strategize about collaborative efforts, share resources and hone new skills and technologies. We invite advocates and activists from across the country to join us for next year’s Creating Change in Dallas, Texas.We are honored to collaborate with so many talented and dynamic organizations.”
— Rea Carey, Executive Director, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force
For the record, I agree with Willie: It’s time our LGBTQ organizations find a way to work together, publicly, to move the ball forward. Our diversity is most effective when it’s leveraged. Together.
So, what’s your thought? How do you feel our leaders are serving us? What do you feel are the necessary next steps for us to achieve full equality, in marriage and civil rights, for all LGBTQ peoples?
(image: thms.nl)
{ 3 comments }
Before attempting to answer the questions posed, I want to add to the bemoaning of our non-assimilated friends. In some forums, I've actually seen where other members of the LGBT community refer to them as freaks. They are generally referring to the clubbers, drag queens, drug heads, etc. The fact is, they are as much a part of this community and as valid as any of the "assimilated" crowd. Someone will always be there to call us freaks – no matter how assimilated we are – we have got to stop referring to the "others" in the community as such.
"So, what’s your thought? How do you feel our leaders are serving us? What do you feel is the necessary next step for us to achieve full equality, in marriage and civil rights, for all LGBTQ peoples?"
As to our leaders, I like to say, "If you are looking for a leader, look in the mirror." We are all capable of becoming leaders in this fight – David, you are an excellent example of that.
Complaining about what the organizations are doing or aren't doing isn't going to get us very far. We are quickly becoming enemies to ourselves. Achieving full equality will likely never happen without huge social change. No minority group has achieved full equality on the social level thus far, no matter how many laws are meant to protect them. Thus, I think educating society is a hugely important factor in obtaining something as close to full equality as possible.
That's my buck-fifty plus tax.
Personally, I believe the bigger an organization, corporation or state gets, the more inefficient it gets. I'm not sure all groups joining together will cause anything beyond confusion at first. We have momentum on our side, I think confusion would slow it down.
Obama won because of grassroots activism. I live in California in a conservative town that had no organized gay presence before Prop 8. The entire organized gay resistance in our town consisted of 6 queers cold calling from donated phones. In the 7-8 months since Prop 8, that little organized resistance has grown from 6 people to over 300. We have become a non-profit equality group, we will have put in place by Thanksgiving (one year's time since Prop 8 passed) TWO diversity centers. We have just secured a grant from a philanthropic organization. This is a huge, monumental achievement. We are doing this the same way Obama won the election, through grassroots activism. Through each committee, each group doing their own thing rather than having one person/group trying to direct it all.
The Rea Carey letter speaks as to how much they are doing to work together with other groups. I have to say nice try but it is not enough. We need to fight for 100% equality for everyone. Nothing else is acceptable. And to do that we need to make the the primary goal of which ever leaders we support. No longer can they sell out our Transgendered brothers and sisters to put gays and lesbians one step closer. We need to embrace our diversity as a community. It is our diversity that makes us powerful. We need to channel that into one place and demand out place at the table. Simply asking for it is not enough. Looking right now at the HRC website there is no picture of a Drag Queen or Leather daddy who have a long history of fighting for equality, but insted we see a picture of President Obama who has failed to act on his campaign promises to help the LGBTQ community.
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